I feel myself teetering on the edge of my mouth getting me into ALOT of trouble. I have been the "Bitch Nurse" that everybody hates to work with because I expect a higher standard of care. It sucks!! Nobody likes to be hated by all, but after a while people get used to you and realize that you are not so bad and what you expect isn't so bad and what I expect becomes their habit. After a while, like in so many nursing homes, people leave and you get a new crew with bad habits, that have been trained badly. A lot don't know better and A lot don't care and I have to go back to Super Witch. I really do hate being that person. I hate coming to work and having to be upset by something everyday, but I see it happening almost daily again and I feel myself getting to the spot where my mouth is going to pop open. When that happens, the crap just fly's out and I find it overwhelmingly hard to stop myself. I know I should deal with issues when they come up, and not let things get to the point where venom flows from my face, but I'm human. I like people to like me. I hate the months that go by where people talk behind my back, because they think I am mean and they twist my words so whatever I said was ridiculous and demanding, a flat out lie, or a defamation of their upstanding superior employee character. Each talking crap about me, to someone, who repeats it to someone, who can't wait to tell me, not that they don't keep on repeating it to others as well. This is the reality I have found of working in the world of a woman dominate field. Gossipy and bitchy, not liking to be criticized even if it is constructive.
Lately it has just been so hard at work. The patients have been impossible and they seem to go crazy about 30 minutes after I walk in the door to put me 3 hours behind, then I spend the entire night trying to play catch up, for which the most part I fail at and end up leaving 2 hours late every day. I can't remember when I made it home before the kids left for school last.
Let me bang out a few examples of the things that are making me NUTS...
Not filling out orders correctly, only completing half of it. It is a very multi-step job, and when it is not finished, the nurse that finds it has to fix it, and since it only seems to bother me that it's not done right.....IT"S ME!!!
Not obtaining orders at all. I had a patient that had a skin tear, when I went to see what the order was because her bandage came off, she had orders for 2 skin tears that were already healed and NO orders for the two that she does have.
Letting things go, when you are told about something. I told about a resident get congested 2 nights in a row, and yet nothing was done about it during the day. The Dr. does not want me to call him after hours to tell him a patient is getting a cold. Don't let it wait until I have to because he has a fever or he is having difficulty breathing.
Not turning patients...When you go in to check someone and they are dry. YOU STILL HAVE TO TURN THEM!!! Not only is there skin delicate and breaks down easy, but dang, I am only 40 and if I lay perfectly still for 2-3 hours, I hurt and ache and it painful to move. I can't imagine what it would be like to be 90 and someone make you lay in the exact same spot for 4 to 5 hours, because I can't move myself.
WASH YOUR DAMN HANDS!!!! OK, yuck on you if you don't wear gloves. I would much rather you would, but OMGoodness, for the love of all that is holy WASH YOUR DAMN HANDS. A couple of days ago I seen someone put their hands on a patients wet pads. Actually I did the same thing. I just went to pull him up like he asked and he failed to inform us that he was wet. I stopped, washed my hands and applied gloves. The other person, said, what is he wet, touched his pads, said "oh, he is" then wiped her hand on her shirt, and kept on going. Honestly, this is where I should have blown my gasket, but really, I was immediately too shocked to comment and couldn't really while there were two patent's in the room, and by the time I was done, and already way late and taken advantage of for being asked to stop what I was doing to do this task anyway (there was 2 aids in the room), I forgot to pause in the hall to deal with it, but now that I am on a blogging roll...might I just say...ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!!!!
Ok, so that was some long examples. I would like to say that I am in no way saying that I am a perfect nurse or a super employee, because I will be the 1st to admit that I am not. I have ADD, so focus is not my forte'. I am very easily distracted which also puts me behind a lot. If I get a chance to procrastinate, a lot of times I do. I let people take advantage of me. I have difficulty saying no, even when I am late, and behind and feeling overwhelmed. I take over things, I fail to let people learn from me, because I would just rather do it right, than explain it and risk them not doing it the way I think they should. AND THE WORST...I forget almost everything. My memory retains things about 30 seconds. If I don't write it down, it's gone, and if I do write it down, there is a very good possibility I will lose the paper I wrote it on so it will be gone anyway.
OK, well that is enough. Chances are if you are one of the few that get to read my venty jumbled mess of words, then you are not among the people that are irritating the crap out of me so the only thing you need to worry about is possible blood spatter when that one co-worker just happens to have broken the camel's back. (just keep some of those sani-bleach wipes in your pocket, they kill blood germs) ;)
I have had the time of my life lately trying to keep up with a couple of really difficult patients and this is so unfair to those that need my help but are denied by the stupidity of the demands or laziness of other patients . Better yet when someone is allowed back to work but does not work due to lifting demands are allowed to be minimal. Then nothing gets done. They are depleting oxygen of those that need it. YOU ARE NOT ALONE
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